Category Archives: Discipleship

Discipleship, Ethos, Experience, Ministry, My Life, Prayer

The Jar of Anger

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10 years ago I was one angry dude. I had more than just a temper. I was mean and surly at the drop of a hat. I was a bit like an emotionally volatile Tasmanian Devil and I cared little about what damage was left in my wake.

The people who bore the brunt of my anger were my parents and my friends. I punched and kicked holes in walls and I even smashed a window once. My anger issues got so bad that I would blank out sometimes. I would remember some of the things I would do or say but there are whole chunks of crazy that my friends would have to tell me about later. It was a miserable experience.

I could make excuses and say that I was bullied or picked on as a kid. I could tell you that nobody liked me and I ate worms. I could make excuses and write off my bad behavior on my teenage hormones. However by say those things I am abdicating responsibility.

The bottom line is I was selfish and immature. I wouldn’t get my way and I flew off the handle. I felt slighted and I would want the world to know about it. Plain and simple.

My anger trapped me in destructive behaviors and stunted me emotionally. I ruined opportunities for relationship growth with friends and family all because I wanted to throw hissy fits. Real mature huh?

Today it is a different story. I have better control of my emotions and I rarely, if ever, raise my voice in anger. My wife has never seen me act out in anger. My friend’s wife, who met me after my change, told me that she has a hard time believing that I was ever angry. She has said that she thinks that we are making up stories from high school. I told her that we could never make up anything that ridiculous. I am thankful that God has smashed the jar of anger that was trapping me. I get a kick out of how great and powerful God is that he has transformed me so much that people have a hard to believing that my old way of living was even real. God be praised!

“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:12-14)

Today, while I don’t put my fist into walls or throw chairs at $2000 projectors, I still have to be on guard. Anger tries to creep back into my life through impatience, pride, and frustration. Like Paul, I will forget what is behind me though. I will press on. May his strength be evident in my weakness. May he continue to smash jars in my life.

May he smash the jars in your life that keep you from truly living.

Peace my friends.

Discipleship, Ethos, Experience, Leadership, Ministry, My Life

Breaking Jars

I graduated from high school ten years ago this week. In May of 1998 I was an 18 year old kid who thought he knew everything there was to know. Now I’m a 28 year old (kid) and the only thing I know for certain is that I know very little. I am still trying to work it all out and I marvel at every time God gives me some tiny insight and I pray that his lessons will stick in my puny little brain.

As I look back over my (short) life I have been fortunate enough to break a few jars that were holding me back from maturing in one way or another. I spent too much time inside these jars allowing them to stunt my growth and causing me to become spiritually/emotionally deformed. Again, it is only by the grace of God that I was able to recognize these jars and it was only by his strength that I was able to crack open these jars and begin the slow, steady progress of being remolded in the image of Jesus.

“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 3:12-14)

Probably the biggest jar I have had to escape from is The Jar of Anger.

to be continued…

Discipleship, Ethos, Experience, Film & Theology, Ministry, Popular Culture

Choose Wisely

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“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field. Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.” (Matthew 13:44-46 TNIV)

It is Indiana Jones Week at the Felkers. We watched Raiders last Saturday and we are trying to squeeze in Temple of Doom tonight (somehow). Tomorrow we will watch Crusade. I am not sure my wife has ever seen The Last Crusade so we will definitely have to watch that one before seeing Crystal Skull on Thursday. Whew! So much action, so little time!

I love watching Dr. Henry Jones run, swing, and punch his way through these adventures chasing after “priceless” pieces of antiquity. There isn’t a risk he isn’t willing to take and we, the audience, cheer him on every step of the way.

Scripture tells us that the kingdom of God can be compared to these great treasures. In fact, the kingdom of God is the greatest treasure of all. In the parables above, Jesus says that when we encounter the kingdom we should treat it like the world’s greatest treasure and that we should do whatever it takes to obtain it. The men in his stories sold all they had just to get their treasure.

Do you realize that we trade the glory and freedom of living in the kingdom for mere trinkets everyday? It should be the other way around!

Spend some time today and meditate on how great the kingdom of God is and what is standing in the way of you obtaining it.

Discipleship, Worship

Insomniac Challenge

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When I am up for hours on end I try and find some things to do to pass the time. I found this passage last night and saw a big insomniac challenge for me.

What if, instead of flipping through the channels or playing video games, I spent my time in worship? What if I spent the time in praise and adoration? In “grateful reflection”?

“God—you’re my God! I can’t get enough of you! I’ve worked up such hunger and thirst for God, traveling across dry and weary deserts.
 
So here I am in the place of worship, eyes open, drinking in your strength and glory. In your generous love I am really living at last! My lips brim praises like fountains. I bless you every time I take a breath; My arms wave like banners of praise to you.  

I eat my fill of prime rib and gravy; I smack my lips. It’s time to shout praises!

If I’m sleepless at midnight, I spend the hours in grateful reflection. Because you’ve always stood up for me, I’m free to run and play. I hold on to you for dear life, and you hold me steady as a post.” (Psalms 63:1-8 MESSAGE)

So there’s the challenge. In the midnight hour when everyone is asleep and I lie awake staring at the ceiling, I will worship. I will reflect on the goodness of the Lord.

Discipleship, Ethos, Experience, Faith in Action, Leadership, Ministry, Wrestling With Scripture

Curveball

Just when you think you’ve got everything together something flies in and obliterates the wall of security that you’ve fashioned around your self. It could be in your home life, business, relationships, church life- every area of your life is fair game for Satan to throw a curveball at you high and inside. It is in your reaction to the curveball that speaks to your innermost self and screams volumes as to who you put your faith into.

What curveball is life throwing at you right now?

What’s your reaction?

I have found comfort in some passages from Isaiah this weekend (44-46). They remind me that the things of this earth- blessing and curses, triumphs and disasters, good times and bad times- are all temporal whereas my God in now and forever. He is a constant guide and constant comfort. He alone is true and he alone is faithful.

With that I can take what ever is thrown at me- big or small, huge or insignificant- because I am not alone.

And guess what? Neither are you.

Discipleship, Faith in Action, Film & Theology, Leadership, Life, Ministry, Youth Ministry

GATM: Iron Man

gatmironman2.jpgLast night I kicked off a new series called (creatively) God @ the Movies and we started with the first big movie of the summer, Iron Man.

Until last week I knew virtually nothing about Iron Man. I spent about three hours in a crash course study of all things Tony Stark. I was extremely thankful for two books that helped me craft my lesson for last night. First, I learned a great deal from Iron Man: Beneath the Armor by Andy Mangels. This a brand new resource that I would define as the definitive tome on the Iron Knight. Mangels takes the reader from the jungles of Vietnam where Tony Stark was injured, captured, and forced to escape his captures in the first Iron Man suit through Stark’s battle with the bottle to the film and the current story lines found in the comic book pages. The book contains some great artwork and gives you all you’d ever need to know about Iron Man.

The other book that really helped me out was Who Needs a Superhero? by H. Michael Brewer. Brewer connected the life of Tony Stark with the life of King David. Both men had issues with their hearts. Tony Stark has a piece of shrapnel that inches closer and closer to his heart threatening to kill him at any moment but he struggles with the heart go deeper than mere flesh. He is unlucky at love (one girlfriend shot him) and business (he has made fortunes and lost each and everyone). All the pressures on his life drove him to battle with alcoholism. King David’s issues with the heart are also well documented. Bathsheba, Amnon and Tamar, Amnon and Absalom, Absalom and David. Heartbreak after heartbreak all because David began to trust in his armor over his God.

After his sin with Bathsheba, David penned this psalm:

“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your unfailing love; according to your great compassion blot out my transgressions. Wash away all my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin.

For I know my transgressions, and my sin is always before me. Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight; so you are right in your verdict and justified when you judge. Surely I was sinful at birth, sinful from the time my mother conceived me. Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb; you taught me wisdom in that secret place.

Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice. Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity.

Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.” (Psalms 51:1-12)

So what can we learn from this multi-million dollar summer blockbuster and what can we learn from this ancient shepherd-king of Israel? We can look for purpose and joy in the things of this world and trust in the strength of our hands but it won’t heal our broken hearts.

Our hearts can only be made whole again in the hands of our Creator. When we give him our hearts of stone he will give us hearts of flesh (Ezekiel 36:26). Only then will we find true purpose and lasting joy.

Yes Lord, create in me a pure heart!

Discipleship, Ethos, Leadership, Ministry, Questions, The Quest, The Word, Theology, Wrestling With Scripture

Did You Really Just Say That?

Last Friday our church building suffered the wrath of the hail and roughly 1/3 of the building was flooded. Sunday smelled awesome!!!

On Monday a cleaning crew arrived and set up a plethora of fans and vacuums to tackle the moisture problem. Due to all this I haven’t been working at the office but from home or the coffee shop or a restaurant. Yesterday I grabbed some lunch while I studied and then I hit up one of my “thinking places.”

I have a handful of places where I walk and think and dream and ponder. My creative juices start flowing and my brain gets a little exercise and fresh air. Yesterday I went to one of the larger Christian bookstores in our area.

While there I overheard (read: eavesdropped) a woman discussing their church’s Bible reading group with her friend. This woman lamented how boring it was.

“I don’t like to read books over a second time. That’s my problem. I’ve read the Bible before. I just don’t see the point in reading it again. We’ve gone through the whole thing. Let’s just move on.”

I probably stared at the same section of Biblical maps for 10 minutes while I pondered this woman’s statement. I don’t know what was going on in the woman’s heart but I couldn’t help but take her words at face value. Was she really bored with reading the Bible with her brothers and sisters? What was she suggesting they move on too?

In The Divine Conspiracy, author Dallas Willard opens the introduction by writing,

My hope is to gain a fresh hearing for Jesus, especially among those who believe they already understand him. In his case, quite frankly, presumed familiarity has led to unfamiliarity, unfamiliarity has led to contempt, and contempt has led to ignorance.

I wonder what that woman would have done with Willard’s assessment.

Of course, the next logical question is, “What will I do with Willard’s assessment?”

Do I assume an overfamiliarity of God’s word or his Son or his ways? Will I allow a haughty sense of presumed knowledge harden my heart with contempt for the Almighty Creator of the Universe?

Or will I always look to read His words with a heart that is open to the things that I see or that are revealed as I read and listen? Can I truly ponder anew all the things that I’ve “learned” or have been taught?

Isaiah 43:10-12 proclaims,

“You are my witnesses,” declares the LORD, “and my servant whom I have chosen, so that you may know and believe me and understand that I am he. Before me no god was formed, nor will there be one after me. I, even I, am the LORD, and apart from me there is no savior. I have revealed and saved and proclaimed— I, and not some foreign god among you. You are my witnesses,” declares the LORD, “that I am God.”

And Isaiah 45:5-8 says,

“I am the LORD, and there is no other; apart from me there is no God. I will strengthen you, though you have not acknowledged me, so that from the rising of the sun to the place of its setting people may know there is none besides me. I am the LORD, and there is no other.

I form the light and create darkness, I bring prosperity and create disaster; I, the LORD, do all these things. “You heavens above, rain down my righteousness; let the clouds shower it down. Let the earth open wide, let salvation spring up, let righteousness flourish with it; I, the LORD, have created it.”

How can you move on from this? How can you feel like you’ve learned all you can about the one who proclaims these words?

May you never tire of reading the words of the Almighty.
May you never assume that you’ve reached the end of your pursuit of Jesus Christ.
May you never hold the leading and teaching of the Spirit in contempt.

Discipleship, Ethos, Experience, Faith in Action, Leadership, Theology, Wrestling With Scripture, Youth Ministry

Cracking Under the Pressure

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A few years ago we were out at dinner with a few friends at a brand new restaurant. The place had only been open a week or so when we gathered together for some cheddar biscuits and conversation.

That night I ordered a big, tall glass of Coca-Cola. When the waiter brought me my drink I grabbed it, lifted it to my mouth, and the glass shattered into a million pieces mere inches from my face.

I would like to blame the demise of the glass on my bulging muscles but the truth is that the glass shattered because it couldn’t take the pressure.

This brand new glass succumbed to the pressure of the heat from the dish washer and when it came to doing its job, holding cold drinks, the glass cracked. Its integrity gave way.

So it is with us.

I spoke to a group of High School students yesterday about submitting to authority (a cracker-jack topic, I know). I told them that this is one area where their integrity can be compromised everyday. It is such a temptation to defy authority or to fail to understand the importance of living under authority. For us, God is the ultimate authority and learning to live under human authority figures helps strengthen our reslove and honors our heavenly Father.

I was honest with them and told them that I have struggled my whole life to live with integrity on this issue. I am independent and I am strong willed. I take issue with poor authority figures and struggle with following men and women I perceive to be weaker leaders. However, God doesn’t put caveats on submitting only to strong leaders or wise authority figures. In Romans 13, Paul states that Everyone must be subject to authorities. That’s a pretty definitive statement.

Standing before them I realized that I was 10 years older than those in the Senior class and I was about 10 years younger than most of the teachers. Every single one of us was under some authority. Some of these authority figures are good, godly, wise, nurturing individuals. Give thanks to God for these men and women. Some though are weak, selfish, and incompetent. Learning to live under both of these types of leaders ultimately gives glory to God and honors his commands.

Often times I have had to learn the hard way and have made many mistakes. Thankfully God keeps repairing the cracks in my heart. Learning to live under authority, good or bad, is just one way to make sure that you are living with integrity.

Don’t crack under the pressure and try to take out your King (1Sam 24). Honor them as you honor God. He is ultimately in control and the ultimate authority of our lives.

By the way, I still had to pay for that Coke. What’s up with that?!?!

2008, Discipleship, Ethos, Experience, Faith in Action, Giving Thanks, Leadership, Life, Ministry, My Life, My Wife Rules, Theology

Proverbs 6:1-5

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This is the year that we get out of debt.

Over 7 years of marriage we’ve managed to keep our heads above water but we have accumulated a little bit of debt. We used our credit cards to travel to see family, we moved, we bought a few pieces of furniture, and we bought a few stupid items.

After taking a step back and looking at our finances we concluded that something had to change or we would run the risk of getting into terrible financial trouble. It doesn’t matter that our level of debt was just under the national average. We were failing in our call to be good stewards of our money and so we decided to do something about it.

Today my wife told me that our credit cards have been completely paid off!!!

In just three months, we paid off a (ahem) crapload of money on those plastic traps. We went and did our taxes, found out that we didn’t owe anything, and then used the money we had set aside for taxes to completely pay those puppies off. We are done!!! No more plastic!

The next step is to pay down our car notes. That’s right, we have two of them and owe money on both. It’s ok though. We shouldn’t have bought my car when we did. I had a truck that was paid off but I was tired of driving that big boy around and I wanted a smaller car. Lesson learned. The plan is to have both of our cars paid off by the time 2009 rolls around.

Big PROPS to my wife because she does our finances.

Thanks babe for doing the hard work and for giving me a generous allowance each week. 🙂 I love you babe!

Discipleship, Ethos, Faith in Action, Leadership, Ministry, Preaching

Sermon Prep

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My follow-up posts on the Paradoxes of Leading from the Second Chair have been put on hold (surprise, surprise) while I prep for my sermon this week.

I am preaching on the importance of Leadership Vision. It is a topic that really gets my heart going.

Proverbs 29:18 says that where there is no vision (khaw-ZONE), the people perish (KJV).

I love how the Message interprets this verse:

If people can’t see what God is doing,
they stumble all over themselves;
But when they attend to what he reveals,
they are most blessed.

It is this message that I want to get across this week.

Leadership Vision isn’t about crazy dreams or overly creative ideas birthed by high and lofty positional leaders.

Leadership Vision is for all people who humbly and reverently seek to make sure that their vision is God’s vision.

It is the ability to see what God is doing and the desire to attend to his revelation. If you can’t or are unwilling to see what God is up too then I would suggest that you are in the way.

We will be specifically looking at Nehemiah, the cupbearer of the king. He wasn’t an important official. He wasn’t a member of the royal family. He was a humble servant. His vision was to see that God was glorified through his life and the lives of those he led. His eyes and heart were opened to God’s vision for living and he let God lead him to do great and wonderful things that brought glory, not to Nehemiah, but to God.

Leadership Vision is never about YOU. It is about bringing glory to Almighty God.

I’ll post updates about the sermon throughout the week. Until then, have a great day and keep seeking out God’s vision.