All posts by mjfelker1980

Best Practices, Personal Leadership, Resources, Self-Leadership

Clean Out

I’m spending a little time on the Black Friday to clean up and clear out my office up at the church building. The space where I work is often (most often) cluttered with notepads filled with ideas, post-it notes with reminders, articles I haven’t read yet, forms I have to filled out, catalogs, cups, pens, and other miscellaneous office-like things.

One of my favorite ministry management books is Youth Ministry Management Tools by Olsen, Elliot, and Work. I have consistently  come back to this book over and over in ministry in order to draft forms or plan events. The whole first half of the book is dedicated to Getting Organized so I am cleaning out the office based on some of their suggestions and tips. Here’s what I’m doing:

1) Sort the stuff in your office
Quickly sort everything into 4 boxes
  • Stuff to FILE: Fill this box with forms, old pictures, personal notes, archives, anything “paper-ish” that you need.
  • Stuff to READ: Fill it with magazines, catalogs, brochures, fliers, event posters, conference brochures,  curriculum samples, and general ministry mail
  • Stuff to GIVE AWAY: In this box sort all your miscellaneous items, free stuff you’ll never read or use, old stufff you’ll never really need, pens, desk junk
  • Stuff to THROW AWAY: Anything you can’t put in the other 3 boxes. Ask, “Can I get this information somewhere else if I throw it away?”
2) Go through the boxes
  • FILE: label each item in the box with a Post-It note giving the name of the folder in which the item belongs. Then invite you assistant or a volunteer to file each one.
  • READ: Use Post-It Notes to identify any article you wish to save. Ask your assistant or a volunteer to rip out or photocopy necessary articles, toss the rest of the magazine, and then file the article.
  • GIVE AWAY: Give yourself 1 week to find  home for all your “good junk.” Then toss it in box 4!
  • THROW AWAY: Give it to the Trash gods ASAP!

In a little over 2 hours I was able to tame the chaos and regain control over my work space.

My next step will be to clear out and organize my file cabinet so that I can actually file the important things that I have uncovered today by cleaning my desk area. My hope to also utilize Evernote to digitally file everything where it is easily accessible and searchable.

I hope you found some of these tips helpful. Having a clean and usable work space is key to getting stuff done. We all have important work to do. Clear the clutter and get back to work! People are counting on us!

Books, Remarkable, Technology

Huger Than Huge

I just got around to catching up on some news articles, tweets, and emails that I saved from last week. One thing that I was very much looking forward to reading was an info-graphic on The World of Amazon that Michael Hyatt linked to last week.

I hope you are sitting at your computer as you read this. The stats presented here are incredible!

I was at my local Borders just days before they closed up shop and I overheard one of the customers bemoaning the fact that the store was shutting down. He said, “I hope this doesn’t start a trend (of brick and mortar book stores closing).”

I thought to myself, “This isn’t the start of the trend, buddy. You’re right smack dab in the middle.” These stats bare that out. The old paradigm of browsing the local bookstore changed drastically even before Borders was forced to shut down and will continue to change due almost exclusively to Jeff Bezos and Amazon.

I browse Amazon daily- for book deals, mp3s, and movies. I have almost made the full jump to reading exclusively on my Kindle. I never thought that would happen but it has.

Amazon has literally built an empire. Don’t believe me? Check out the graphic below.

Amazon Infographic

Source: Frugaldad.com

Personal Leadership, Randomness, Thanksgiving

5 Things for Thanksgiving Break

I am very much looking forward to the next 5 days celebrating and being with family and friends over the Thanksgiving break. I am excited to hang with my sister for a few days and I’m preparing to cook the world’s greatest turkey dinner for Thursday. This will be an EPIC week!

I am also excited about getting to catch up on some things that I haven’t had time for over the past few weeks. In fact I have Five Things I Want to Do Over Thanksgiving Break.

  1. Listen to the new Switchfoot Album- Switchfoot put out a brand-new album back at the end of September. September!!! It has been sitting in my iTunes since then and I haven’t listened to one track yet because I wanted to sit and listen to it all the way through. This week, I will have some time to strap on the headphones and finally listen to Vice Verses.
  2. Make a big dent in Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson- I also have yet to dive deep into the biography to end all biographies. I have read reviews, reflections, and opinions on it but I have only read a couple of chapters. This week I want to really burn through a good part of the book.
  3. Organize my Office- Actually I want to organize my office at work and clean my office at home. Loose notes,stacks of paper, and old magazines- you’re on notice.
  4. Catch up on some podcasts- I have a handful of podcasts that I haven’t gotten around to listening to. Sometimes I hate listening to them in the car because I don’t want to drive and take notes in my Moleskin. Call me crazy, but if I’m taking notes on living and leading more effectively than wrapping my car around a tree seems counter productive.
  5. Rest- Vacation is all about spending time with the ones you love and just being present. I want to spend some time just being over the next few days.

Enjoy your break and enjoy your Thanksgiving everyone!

 

Bible Study, Ethos, Thanksgiving

What I’m Thankful For Right Now

As I was studying this morning, God hit me upside the head with Colossians 3:15-17. Paul says,

“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.”

I was struck by how PEACE and THANKFULNESS seem to go hand in hand.

Too often our focus on what we DON’T HAVE or what we DESPERATELY WANT or what SOMEONE ELSE HAS keeps us in a state of discontent and turmoil. Cultivating a heart that is THANKFUL will help us keep our focus on God and not on lesser things.

When I spend more time THANKING God for ALL that he has done on my behalf and ALL that he has blessed me with the less time I have to spend worrying about all that other stuff. Thankfulness paves the way to peace.

I made a quick list of just some of the things I am thankful for right now…

I am thankful that Jesus saved/saves me! (Titus 3:4-7; 1 John 1:7)

I am thankful for my smoking’ hot WIFE who cares for me, encourages me, keeps me in check, and puts up with ALL of my junk. She takes care of our home and is an incredible mother! (Proverbs 31: 10-12; 26-31 really sums it all up)

I am thankful for my incredible SON who is a constant reminder to me what pure joy looks like. That kid PLAYS hard and LOVES deeply. I LOVE THAT KID!!!

I am thankful that we have another BABY on the way that is due in May! Right now, everything looks healthy and progressing the way it should. We had an ultrasound earlier this week and the little guy or girl gave us a great big wave “Hello!” Very, very thankful!

I am thankful for OUR CHURCH and that I have the opportunity to serve, teach, care for, and lead this group of people week in and week out.

I am thankful that I have a TEAMMATE in ministry that I get to work alongside. I love sharing an office with someone who shares my vision for ministry and is excited about what God is doing in and through this community.

I am thankful for the ability to READ and LEARN. This is no small thing. I am often struck by how incredibly blessed I am to have- not just the opportunity to read- the ABILITY to read and comprehend things. I don’t know where I’d be without the gift of learning.

I am thankful for MUSIC. Again, no small thing. I never want to take for granted some of the pleasures that God has given me. I love listening to, talking about, and pretty much everything else about music. Thank you for U2 and Fender and iPods and bass and Beats by Dre headphones and guitar licks and lyrics and iTunes and … you get the point.

So here’s the challenge for you… Make your own list. Take some time today to tell God “thank you” for the gifts and blessings in your life.

 

Work Camp, Youth Ministry

Inspired

I trying to finish up some prep work on a meeting I have scheduled for tomorrow. I’m still the Direct of Arlington Work Camp and we are gearing up for another great year!

We are meeting for the second annual Plan and Pray Event for Work Camp 2012. The hope for tomorrow is for us to DREAM BIG for next summer’s camp week.

I was looking for some inspiration for the meeting and came across this great video entitled, “People Are Awesome.”

Absolutely love it!!!

(If you can’t view the video, click HERE)

I love videos like this because they get my heart pumping and open my eyes to all sorts of possibilities. Sure we won’t even try to remotely pull off any of those stunts (Unfortunately, Youth Ministry Interns won’t agree to sign liability waivers. Bummer.) but just watching these stunts gets me super excited and focused on bringing my A game to the creative meeting.

When it comes to a creative meeting, you’ve got to get fired up! The thing I love about the Plan and Pray Event is that this will mark the official beginning to our camp. The ideas and plans that we initiate tomorrow will start taking shape and culminate in a great experience for students and adults next summer.

Keep us in your prayers tomorrow as we start planning and preparing for Work Camp 2012.

I can’t wait!

Best Practices, Resources, What I'm Reading

Reading to Lead

This is the 1,001 post for Kicking at the Darkness! To celebrate this milestone I want to pay tribute to the many great blogs and authors that I read each and every day.

I read quite a bit. I strongly believe that Leaders are Readers so I try and dedicate some part of each day to intentional reading and learning. Throughout the day I find time to read from a variety of sources- books, newspapers, blogs, magazines/journals, Twitter and Facebook.

Every day I have the opportunity to become a better leader. I have access to some of the greatest leaders in the world through blogs, Twitter, and publishing. You do too. Don’t miss an opportunity to learn by reading.

Here are a few of my favorites. Take some time today to invest in your leadership! Trust me: the ROI is crazy high!

Leadership
Michael Hyatt
 Seth Godin
Jon Acuff
Brad Lomenick
 Catalyst Space
One Question with Ken Coleman
 Tim Schrader
 Fast Company
 Books @ Leadership Network

Christian Ministry
Mark Batterson
 Perry Noble
 Mike Breen
 Tony Morgan
 Neue
Leading Smart
Pastors.com
WithoutWax.tv
Don Miller

Family
Orange Parents
Doug Fields

News
Drudge Report
 Mediaite
USA Today
 Dallas News

Fun
Stuff Christians Like
 Bryan Allain
 U2 Sermons
@U2

Magazines/Journals
Leadership
Entertainment Weekly
 Neue
Relevant
Wired

Twitter
@stevenfurtick
 @andystanley
 @RevRunWisdom
 @MaxLucado
 @JonAcuff

Current Books
Community by Brad House
Engage by Nelson Searcy
The King Jesus Gospel by Scot McKnight
Good to Great by Jim Collins (reread)
Nearing Home: Life, Faith and Finishing Well by Billy Graham

Ethos, Leadership

Never Enough

Bring it everyday.

Dave Ramsey said that from the stage at Catalyst 2 weeks ago and I have refused to let that out of my head. I’ve scribbled it in my journal. I’ve written it with a Sharpie on colorful Post-it notes. I’ve hash-tagged it in several texts and tweets. I love the motivation and clarity that phrase has given me.

We all need reminders and calls to persevere and endure all that life throws at us. Left to yourself, you’re prone to give up and lay low. How do I know that about you?

I’m the exact same way. I need a phrase or a song or a verse or a challenge to remind me to keep pressing forward, to keep working hard. I don’t want to bring it every once in a while. I don’t want to  bring it whenever it is convenient. That’s not for me.

I want to bring it everyday.

I hope the following video can inspire you today. It is a video put together for the basketball team for Harding University, my alma mater.

Whatever you are doing today, whoever you do it for… Don’t quit. Keep up the fight. Press on. Bring it. Everyday.

Leadership

New Focus

In an effort to clarify and draw into focus exactly what I hope to accomplish with this blog I’ve come up with a new description I want to share with you.

If you spend any amount of time reading this blog- THANK YOU! I appreciate you more than you know.

The best way that I can continue to thank you for reading and coming back is to step up my game, give you some razzamatazz, and deliver to you some great content that will be meaningful to you. So, I’m clearing away some clutter and narrowing my focus to laser intensity.

Kicking at the Darkness is about my experiences and focuses on what I’m learning in relation to leadership as a young minister, husband, and father. I write for other young leaders to help encourage and equip them to live lives of significance and impact.

There you go. That’s the new focus of Kicking at the Darkness.

Welcome to the adventure.

Conference, Discipleship, Leadership, Ministry, Mission, Remarkable, Resources

Present at Catalyst 2011

I just returned from my 9th Catalyst Conference in Atlanta. Hands down, this is always my favorite weekend of the year. It is an opportunity to hear new voices, reflect on my calling, and cast vision for the future. This year was no different except…

Now I’m no longer the youth minister but now I’m the team leader. I’m the senior person on staff. I’m responsible for other leaders and volunteers now. The game changed since last October. It’s a freeing, scary, awesome, terrifying place to be. I am loving it.

What I love about Catalyst is that I don’t return with a series of new plans or programs that I’m ready to implement this Wednesday. Catalyst isn’t the kind of conference where you change everything about your ministry and programs 10 minutes after stepping off the plane back home.

Catalyst is a slow burn. The thoughts, concepts, challenges, and exhortations go to work in your own heart and mind first. Then, over time the things I have heard in October will begin to guide and change my approach or thinking. The change has to start within me as the leader.

Here are a few of the thoughts or concepts that are currently marinating in my soul from this weekend. I don’t know what they all mean for my context right now but I’m trusting that God will use them to make a big change in me so I can lead where I am more effectively.

  • Don’t be fair, be engaged. – Andy Stanley
  • Go deep rather than wide. Go long-term rather than short-term. Go time, not just money. – Andy Stanley
  • Life is people. – Jim Collins
  • 3 Behaviors that allow leaders to thrive: 1) Fanatical Discipline, 2) Empirical Creativity, 3) Productive Paranoia – Jim Collins
  • The Signature of mediocrity is not an unwillingness to change, innovate, or grow; it’s chronic inconsistency. – Jim Collins
  • Fire Bullets, then Cannonballs. – Jim Collins
  • What is my “20 Mile March“?
  • Learn to marry creativity with discipline so that disciple amplifies creativity. – Jim Collins
  • We live in a world that is holding on for dear life to straws. – Joel Houston
  • An incredible team in a culture of excellence matters. – Dave Ramsey
  • Bring it everyday. – Dave Ramsey
  • Readdress your calling everyday. – Dave Ramsey
  • “If I could get a transcript of your prayers over the last month, what would be the one thing you kept praying for?” – Francis Chan
  • We make the things we are afraid of functional gods that we worship. – Mark Driscoll
  • Fear makes us false prophets. We predict a future that will never happen and cause ourselves fear, stress, and anxiety over these things that will never happen.- Mark Driscoll
  • Fear is vision without hope. – Mark Driscoll
  • FEAR NOT! Fear not, your Daddy is with you. – Mark Driscoll
  • Hatred of injustice is not the same thing as a love for everyday people. – Cornel West
  • Love is about going on the offensive. – Cornel West
  • We are who we are because somebody loved us. – Cornel West
  • Messiahs are crucified; prophets are assassinated. – Cornel West
  • Be intentional about pouring into those leaders that are coming behind you. It’s not about filling their cup. It is about emptying yours. – Andy Stanley
  • MEDs– Model, Explain, Demonstrate – Andy Stanley
  • Success is ultimately measured by whether or not you leave your responsibilities in capable hands. – Andy Stanley
  • Let’s hand the church better off than it was handed to us… to those who can do it better than us. – Andy Stanley

These are just a few examples of the leadership challenges and questions that are currently running laps around my head and heart. I walked away from Catalyst 2011 just like every other year thinking:

I am so blessed and honored to have experienced what I just experienced. Thank you Father for the Catalyst Team and for all that they do.

It is my prayer that God will give me the wisdom I need to do something with what I heard and experienced.

See you in Dallas, Catalyst Team!

 

 

 

Ethos, Leadership Axioms, My Wife Rules

Axiom 2: Family First

It has been a pretty crazy week around the Felker household. Our son came down with the stomach bug late last week. My wife got it in the wee small hours on Sunday. I thought I could escape the plague but I was infected and early Monday morning I was down for the count. The only thing I could do on Monday was lay still and hug my pillow. I absolutely hate being sick.

Thankfully, this bug was only a 24hr things and so we are all on the mend. However, this family fight against the stomach virus really threw me off my schedule. I lost a whole day at work and had things pretty booked on Tuesday so I was unable to post my second installment in the Leadership Axioms series. So, with that said, let’s talk about this week’s Leadership Axiom.

I want to live and die by this week’s axiom. I have tried to make this belief a core part of who I am and I have said this statement for so long that have forgotten where and when I first heard it. I didn’t coin this phrase but I wouldn’t care if it were inscribed on my tombstone. For me, as a minister, this should be no pithy, quaint saying. This is life and death stuff we are talking about here.

Are you ready? Here it is…

261588_10150222180753014_500748013_7413182_6933337_n-1

I refuse to sacrifice my family on the alter of ministry.

No question. This is one of the most important things I can do to succeed and to guarantee that I leave a legacy of faith and not a hollow, charred out crater of a life with collateral damage strewn from here to kingdom come.

Too much? I don’t think so.

I’ve heard too many stories. Seen too much hurt.

Nothing- and I mean NOTHING- is more important to me than my wife and my son. If I don’t get MY FAMILY right, I really don’t believe I can get anything right.

I’m not perfect. If I don’t stay on top of my schedule it can quickly squeeze out any and every good intention that I have. Here are a few things I try to do to make sure that I am putting my family first.

  • Calendar- As best as I can, I do not make definitive plans with a meeting (in the evening) or weekend event without first consulting Sandy and synching our calendars. We share an iTunes account so we can see each others calendar changes and appointments on our iPhones. This isn’t fool proof but it is a great way to defer to one another. For weekend things, Sandy gets first dibs at me. In fact, there is something coming up in the next few weekends that I’ll have to skip out a little early on because we are going to the pumpkin patch. No way I am missing that!
  • Schedule-Free Night(s)- Last year, we had at least two week nights where I did not have a regularly scheduled event in the evenings. We essentially had Monday and Thursday nights to ourselves. This meant that we could spend quality and quantity time with each other on a consistent basis. If I needed to go to a game or meet with someone or do something that I needed to do for ministry there was some margin. Things are a bit different this season. We still have our Monday nights but I am teaching Financial Peace on Thursdays until December. The decision to teach was made jointly by Sandy and I with the understanding that we would have to be extra intentional about protecting our family time on Mondays. Our Saturdays have opened up quite a bit this season so there have been plenty of opportunities to catch up on together time (too cute?).
  • Communication- As you can see in the last to sections, Sandy and I try to constantly communicate with one another. Communicating dates and times are important but what we strive to do is communicate expectations. The goal is honesty with one another. “I need more time here.” “Can you help me with this?” “I really need this to happen?” “Is it ok if we…” Marriage and Ministry cannot coexist without clear communication and a willingness to be open about expectations and needs. My default is to keep working.
  • Team Work- This may not work as well with everyone but… When it comes to ministry, we are a team. We go together and we work well together (painting a room together is another story though!). We worked together at a school right out of college, we worked together in youth ministry, and now we are trying to see what working together in this new role looks like. I love that in my ministry, my wife can take part and that she has the freedom to have her own ministry. We really strive to be a team in the best sense of the word. In running, they say that a way to improve and to reach new levels of success is to have a partner to pace with. We are that partner for one another.
  • Improvement- I do not want to come across as though I have learned the secret to protecting my family and my schedule. I am way too young to have it all figured out. Everything is a work in progress. My ideal would be that once a week we could sit down over coffee with pen and calendars in hand and map out the perfect week. I would love to do that!!! That’s the goal I want to work towards but we are a long way off. I am missing those Thursday night right now- but we both feel that offering FPU is something we can and should make time for. At the end of this season we will readjust and see what is needed. In fact, these conversations have already begun.

The only secrets I have learned are that I must embrace the truth that MY FAMILY COMES FIRST and that we must be FANATICAL about finding ways to make that truth a reality.

I ask that you pray for us that we will continue to choose to make our family a priority and I challenge you to embrace the best way to ensure that you leave a legacy of faith for everyone that you minister to. There is life in this statement. There is ultimately freedom in this statement. Don’t be another burnout. Don’t let you family be another statistic.

Say it loud. Say it proud.

“I refuse to sacrifice my family on the alter of ministry!”